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Am I just A Fool
Thursday, April 25, 2013 @ 9:04 pm
What is all you said was a lie? I was a backup plan all along. A rebound just to fill the void. Then what now? I mean really. What if ever single thing was a lie from the start to the end. I mean the signs are there. You don't hold me like you used to anymore. You dont treat me like how you once did. You say you love me, but you show me otherwise. It feels as though I am falling into a hold deeper than I can ever dig myself out from. The risk of another broken heart, the risk of being cheated and lied to is so big. Yet I am still here, hoping that I am not going to cut up into pieces and be fed to the wolves.
I am tired of playing the broken hearted girl.
Friday, April 12, 2013 @ 5:46 pm
I am broken, more and more each time I go back to the game of loving someone. Why is it that, I am hurting much more than the other party? Why does it affect me much more than it affects you? I mean really... Every single fucking time when I thought that I have found the one, it comes back up and bite me in the butt. Did I do something so bad that Karma has something huge in store for me?
Being hurt every single moment aint so sweet after all. Yes I did say that I didnt mind falling in and out of love, but really doesn't everyone say that out of motivating someone else. How many times does someone have to break till they end up broken? No glues, no thread could ever let them learn how to love again. And they just end up being souless creatures, deprived of love within them. Never did I ever thought of ever giving up on love and that my prince charming would somewhat be out there waiting for me, but didnt they say three times a charm? Maybe if this really do goes down the train even way before it started I guess I should just give up the whole idea of love. It's not worth playing in the lion den's at all. You don't come out stronger. You come out torn apart just for the world to see. Who am I kidding maybe I am not cut out to be in this game of love eventually. Distance that is the only thing that I feel each day. Further and further each time. EVERYONE NEEDS SAVING AND SAVING YOU IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO ME RIGHT NOW.
Sunday, April 07, 2013 @ 10:38 pmCan I call you mine soon?
Monday, April 01, 2013 @ 7:25 pm
Every time she is not by my side, I get a huge waft of missing her. What I would give to be walking with her any place right now just talking non related things. Holding hands and just not worry about anything in the world. Having those small tickle fights.
How do I not love you more each and every day. Never have I felt so special in front of anyone than this time round. Volunteering with her friends and all of them being cool with us being together was just adorable. She held my hands where ever we went. Crossing the road, going up stairs and just every single moment she had the chance of holding me. This was the very first time someone was so proud to show me off. It was as though I had nothing to worry about. Someone that didnt mind holding my hands in front of anyone at all. The one that treats me special with or without their friends along.
I want her long term as long as time goes on. I want to have her always holding her tight and never letting her go or even ever give her the chance to fall for another. As I want you to fall for me each and everyday, being by you or when i'm not. You are my honeybee. So lets make this work. You and me.
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this is me.
Rawr I'm Shakilah. People call me Shak. I turn a year older on 14 May. I am covered in FRECKLES. I love SWEETS they are like my small little version of happiness. I love to act but I'm just a little good at it.
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