Two times in a freakin' row. What does that means? How would I know I don't control my dreams. I hated myself for what i did yesterday. I'm sorry. That's the only thing I could do now. Apologize... I wish I could back up and did it differently. I usually get scared of doing things because I'm afraid of what is gonna happen after.

$109.45++, that's for today. I feel so bad. The week's finishing, looks like the theme gonna change. I'm going to the doctor's, back to high school, going to college the next and i don't know what's more in store. I'm still free on Friday and I've still yet to watch Dear John, if you know me, you know where I'm going with this... ;)

I was your muse. You couldn't stop drawing. You drew me in story books, and in anything that could be drawn. They came out perfect. You look up and told me "This is you." I smiled and sat close to you, looking you in the eyes, not doing anything else. I woke up and I remembered you touched my arm before it ended. I'll keep that with me.

Why does my brother always have to open his shirt so slowly in front of the mirror in the living room? I've been wanting to ask that question for some time now. He is so obsessed over his vanity, I'll lose to him if we were in some sort of competition. Hahaha

I so wanna go out, but I don't wanna call plans off. I really do hope my dad will be working tomorrow. I love him don't get me wrong, he's awesome but he'll bribe me to go out with him, and I can never resists. Please let me go out not feeling guilty.

ps. i made a wish at 11.11 :D

Does anyone know a song that goes "you were the girl..." in a British pop male singer song? Does anyone know it. Cause I'm going crazy tryna find this song. I forgot the title. It's from last year to the Lasalle open house, to now Oscar commercial on Channel 5. Please do tell me if anyone know the song title...

You want my attention than call. Sometimes I get lazy to text, sometimes people text me at the wrong time. So call, I can never run away from that. If I don't answer prolly I'll call back. :D

Sometimes I do wish I know what to say to you when you miss her. No one really knows, but I do miss her too. The way she holds me close when I'm down, makes me feel as though nothing could hurt me. Even though it was 5 years ago, it's seems like it was just yesterday. You were fine the day before and the next day after school I heard you were gone. She remembered my birthday like no one did. I was blessed with her in my life and I do miss her a whole lot. I hope she's doing fine and I hope she'll always be watching over me.

I hate how I can never stay mad at one person in my life. It's like I know her so much and getting mad at her feels so right but so wrong, every single time. Just want her to know, In the end everything will be fine, If it's still not fine than it's not the end yet.

Btw, at last someone who looks like Sean Faris, in Singapore. What a gentlemen. *sigh*

So this was the photo I've been waiting for such a long time to come out, and at last it has. How awesome can it be. It was taken at ECP. I should have so wore a white shirt and shorts instead, it'll be much more awesome. It's ok it's out anyways.

People keep on asking me how come I usually don't update regularly on a certain blog. Well it's because I have 2 blogs, an Lj and a tumblr to update. So right now my life scattered in all the 4. But myhappyeverafter is gonna be a 365 thing. I hope.

I love Stephen Hampton!! He's awesome.

Been feeling so down this week and it kinda sucks. It's only two days into the week and I'm feeling so miserable. I hope I could make myself feel better soon. I wanna go get some ice-cream this Friday and Saturday. I hope it'll make me feel better.

This morning, i woke up and texted Good Morning! I looked back and said, what's the point. I hid under my covers and cried.

I could still remember our little small fights. Thinking back they were really hilarious. She made me a whole lot stronger through out High School. I still remembered talking, complain and whining just about anything at all. Our fav topic was Boys. They were always thee top of our list and we never stop even after being threaten by teachers to get out the class. We cook awesome together and making people laugh. I'm glad I had her. She was my very first friend I made in High School. "Hi! Name saya Asiqah. Awak class aper?"

I promised no more facades this year. But I couldn't help it, those cracks were not meant for anyone to notice. They were for me and only me. Having facades are growing on me I don't even know when it's gone. So am I actually. I'm still asking myself.

HAPPY AWESOMEWASOME BIRTHDAY! THIS IS RIDONGCULOUS YOU'RE 18!!! SO OLD HAHA!!! LET'S MAKE AWESOME MEMORIES ON THIS SPECIAL DAY!!! RAWR! WOOF! MEOW!

What do you wear to such places? Is it gonna be scary like what people have told me? Is it gonna be something awesome? What do you do in such places? I feel so young and naive right now. Like a little girl in a big world.

There is no stopping. I didn't say I didn't like it. But someday if it really came true, I wouldn't mind that at all. Not even one bit. Someday, one day, I want the world to see what you really mean to me.

Even though how hard I try saving up my money, I can never seem to reach 17.90. I always have something else to get, always. I don't wanna wait for my Birthday cause it's kinda long...

I'll take you out. Drop you off on the outskirts of our town and I'll leave a trail of roses that will lead you back home. You like picking a fight for no good reason cause you know I'll never leave. I love you half to death but you're killing me. But, I wouldn't have it any other way. You can change your clothes and change your hair but you'll always be the same. My favorite kind of pain.

Do they have it here? Bacon and Chocolate, sounds so good together. I'm so hungry, I could eat anything right now. Can I eat something now??? Banana? Ohhh... Opps. Sidetracked.

I wanna try to accomplish this list. It looks so awesome. Should I do it? I've done 1,2,7 and 8 I'll do the rest soon :) Woo Hoo!!!

Random post of random insults. Is this Bubu? Let's hope he won't go today... You made me laugh so hard without me knowing who Bubu was and now, I miss those insultations we made. Yes insultations ain't a word, but it is gonna be in the Dictionary or Me soon. I'm glad I have you as a Best Friend ever. Haha.

Lots of love,
Bubu insultor.

Rawr! Right now I do feel like eating ice-cream pretty badly. Either PH or MMS. I want it now badly, no I need it badly. Looks like I gotta wait till Saturday before I could get any of it. Wait there's no B&J's anywhere near. Darn it. How bout tomorrow? Hmmm... Maybe I could get out the house for a while and buy one. But where could I get one? Opps... Ok so should I go for the family gathering or not? I want to but I don't want to at the same time. I want to play bowling and cycle at the same time. I hate making decisions.

It so awesome to know that there always someone that likes the same thing as me. Someone who have the same interest and all other stuff. We'll never have nothing to not talk about. Because there's so much in the world that needs to talk about. I'm blessed! Are you?

I don't know what it is, but people with hazel green eyes just gets to me. They have the most perfect eyes ever apart from Blue eyes. I want to meet someone with Hazel Green eyes. When their eyes sparkle it's just mesmerizing. As though nothing mattered anymore. The only thing you would like to do, is be there looking into their eyes non-stop. Please God, let me meet someone with Hazel Green eyes. I promise I'll be good this year. It'll be like an awesome Christmas present. Please...

"I didn't came here to get YOU,

I came here to be with YOU"

Sometimes we don't realize but it's something we are all good at. Mostly everyone. That's it making people wait. There's one thing everyone does and we're perfect at it. We disappoint one another and we don't realize it after that.

Example:
. You end a conversation with "I'll call you back", "I'll text you later", "I'll talk to you after this", "Meet you this weekend"
- But you never in the end

We never fail to disappoint, it's an everyday thing. We usually make people wait, it's in our blood. It makes us raise our hopes high and end it with someone crushing it badly. We make people wait on the phone, wait on someone, wait on just anything. And we never apologize when we do such things.

You're Not Sorry

Gosh... Lately I've got nothing to wear out, even though my closet looks like it could explode any time now. I'm so gonna spend all my money once i get it all on clothes. No one is gonna stop me. Top of the list, Short Dress. Isn't it what Jessica Stroup said, "The Shorter The Better". The list goes on never-ending. So I'm gonna stop with number 2 that is the perfect pair of shoes. They are now on my wanted list. Once found, the only reward that it'll gonna get is making me look awesome. It's all about ME... Adding one more item to list, is the lavender nail polish that i have eyed for so long.

Next outfit to wear is my denim skirt, black tank under purple tank with a grey sweater that looks like a baseball jacket. I need to get a better one that fits nicely.